Just Relax...

I can't really think of many medical conditions where the conventional wisdom on treating the condition is to "just relax". When you have unexplained infertility you get used to hearing this from well meaning people. I may get flamed here, but, they may just be right -- just not in the sense that they mean.

Those of us in trenches of IF hear of many different way to attack the problem. Ideas range in a spectrum from IVF and medicated IUIs to Traditional Chinese Medicine (acupuncture and herbs), yoga and guided meditation. I'm inclined to give credence to it all because what do I know? I think my best bet is try everything I can that makes sense to me.

Do I think stress is preventing me from getting pg? No, not really. People who have stressful lives get pg all the time (and some are even on the pill when they do!). Do I think I am not pregnant because I had some wine this month, ran 3 miles or because I ate a donut? That seems ridiculous as well when you think of all of the children who are conceived under adverse conditions.

However, I do think there is something to be said for guided meditation, resolving internal conflicts, and regular stress relief ! I do believe there is a strong mind-body health connection and it makes sense to me that a woman needs to be healthy in order to conceive. How great that this process forced me to focus on doing that!

Even so, I still hate to hear someone being told "just relax." It's kind of ridiculous when someone is told they aren't getting pregnant because they're trying too hard. After all, wanting to be a mom to the point of working hard to become one is a laudible thing.

And maybe, just maybe, trying hard is exactly what is needed for some people to get pregnant.