Thank you

I just couldn't bring myself to post over the last two weeks. I wanted to focus all my energy on the last post and thought of the little guys constantly. I got out my college textbook on developmental biology and brushed up on everything that happens during the first few weeks. It's so amazing and miraculous and just so darn cool. By day 5 all those cells know what they are destined to become - skin, nerves, gut... Just so interesting to me.

On Wednesday of this last week, all of my pregnancy symptoms had disappeared, and I was very sad.

But I wanted to thank you guys that read my blog and have sent emails of encouragement and support and prayer. I feel so grateful to have such good friends. I don't often show my gratitude, or really ever tell you how much I think about you. I have pictures of your kids up over my desk here at home and I think about each of you often. I worry about you whenever I think something isn't going well and celebrate your successes when it is. I don't have the capacity to express it as I should, but know that I wish I could and maybe the prayers I say will make up for it.

So we got the test results back this morning and my poor husband must have thought they were bad because I literally sat down on the floor and started crying as I listened to the message. This was not unlike when he proposed, I'll add. But the beta was 82. Anything above 5 means your pregnant and they really want it to be above 50 for this day post transfer. I have to go back on Tuesday and get another test to see if it doubles. So there are a some more milestones to reach before we know it's viable. Really, I thought I would be happy to just know I could get pg, but I must say, I really want this little guy to stick around!

And I'll add that if this guy does stick around, he is going to be a meterologist. He's had to endure 2 weeks of loud thunderstorms and lots of rain and lightning. And now his mommy is sunburnt...

FYI, My family doesn't even know we did IVF and I haven't shared my blog with my family yet. I am dying to tell them, but we are going to wait for awhile.